How disappointing.NICEVILLE — A man who tried to enter the Mullet Festival without paying the $10 admission fee was arrested.
Niceville Police were called to the vendor parking area at the festival after a man tried to re-enter the event after leaving it, according to an arrest report from the Niceville Police Department.
When the officer approached the man, he smelled “the distinct odor of an alcoholic beverage emitting from his person and mouth,” the report stated.
Make sure the motor home is stopped before you walk out of it. DEFUNIAK SPRINGS – A 55-year-old woman suffered serious injuries after she fell out of a motor home that was traveling on Interstate 10.
About 4 p.m. Tuesday, three people from Midland City, Ala., were heading westbound on I-10 a few miles from the U.S. Highway 331 exit in a 1975 Dodge motor home when Sharon R. Glover walked to the rear of the motor home to use the restroom, according to the Florida Highway Patrol. Glover somehow fell out of the vehicle and slid 100 feet on the paved emergency lane before hitting the grass shoulder.
“It is unknown if the passenger opened the wrong door or leaned on the door,” an FHP news release said.
Drugs? Or just crazy?WEST PALM BEACH, Fla. Officials at a South Florida safari said a woman, wearing an open robe, drove her car through the park and then sped away. A Lion Country Safari official said the woman made comments Wednesday that terrorists were coming to kill the animals. Park employees called authorities and secured the park, but she drove off. The woman was not identified.
Had the employee been allowed to carry a hammer this would never had happened.ORANGE COUNTY -- A hammer was the weapon of choice for two angry men Friday night.
According to Orange County Sheriff's Office, two men became upset after they were asked to show their identification at an ABC Liquor store on South Orange Blossom Trail. The two men left the store, but came back a short time later with a hammer and chased down the store employee, hitting him on the head.
If he filled the pillowcase with nickels it would seem more Florida-ish.NICEVILLE - Police have arrested a man for attacking his wife with a pillow.
It happened like this: On Oct. 1 Niceville Police were called after the man and his wife got into an argument at their Peachtree Street address.
According to the report, the two were arguing about the fact that he doesn't have a job and isn't helping her with the kids.
Better than a cheap Walmart knockoff. TAMPA - A Hillsborough County man thought he was buying a Halloween decoration when he spent $8 for a box of bones at a yard sale in Brandon. But when he and his wife got the box home, they realized it was an actual human skeleton.
"I got looking at it and thought, gosh, this is the real thing," recalled Judith Fletcher, wife of Mitchell Fletcher, the retiree who bought the box of bones.
Looking at this mugshot you'd think he'd have been heartless enough to run over a nun pushing a baby carriage. But...... BRADENTON, Fla., Oct. 4 (UPI) -- A Florida man used water guns and water balloons to spray weed killer on his neighbor's plants because he was owed money for drugs, police said.
Seriously fucked up. ST. PETERSBURG — Less than 24 hours after a family was held hostage at gunpoint, police said it happened again — this time with a bizarre twist.
A woman was forced to melt butter, and one of two armed men rubbed it on her chest while robbing her home late Monday night, police said. She wasn't injured, police said, because the butter cooled before she poured it on herself.
If a cop can't subdue the kids from Key Fucking West he should be carrying a pink pistol. At least one parent, however, is upset at a recent talk the school resource officer (SRO) gave students, including her two daughters, that outlined when he can use an electric stun gun on unruly students or intruders on campus.
"Both of the girls had a class in which school resource officer and [Key West patrolman Robert Bulnes] came into the classroom and told the students that this principal is not messing around; how and when he can tase the kids," Karen Ortega told The Citizen Thursday. "What I gathered from the kids was basically it was a lecture and sounded more like when you go into prison; when you first get there, you are going to follow this rule, that rule, and if you're not in line, we can do this, we can do that."
Better ways exist to let your significant other know it's over.A man in a combative relationship is accused of setting fire to photos of his current flame in their apartment — putting neighbors' units at risk of burning, police said.
Hollywood police arrested Jonathan Sanchez Jimenez, 23, on Wednesday. He is charged with one count of first-degree arson and one count of aggravated assault, Hollywood Police Lt. Manny Marino said.
On Thursday, Broward County Judge John "Jay" Hurley set Jimenez's bail at $20,000. The judge ordered him to have no contact with his girlfriend, and required him to get a mental evaluation and wear an electronic monitoring bracelet.
This man should be given a straw and forced to drink the mess he created.According to a Charlotte County Sheriff's Office report, Obidov told employees at the station that he'd accidentally put unleaded gas into his diesel engine car. He then attempted to use two garden hoses to pump the gas out.
The fluid from one hose drained onto the asphalt near a storm drain, and the other
hose drained down a grassy slope that leads to a protected wetland area, 6 feet away from a sign indicating the protected area.
When approached by the Wal-Mart Assistant Manager who pointed out that he was draining the gasoline into the wetlands, Obidov reported stated "I got to do what I got to do" and continued to drain his fuel tank.
...how I can just kill a man. (After you kill a robber just remember to flush your drugs down the toilet before the cops arrive).Deputies say the husband was able to grab his loaded gun near the bed and open fire, hitting one who was masked, once in the head. The other was hit in the torso.
Both are teenagers.
Otilio Rubio, 15, is in critical condition at Lakeland Regional Medical Center. The other injured teen, William Murphy, 16, was shot in the torso and is in stable condition.
Judd says the homeowner called 911 and responding Davenport police and Polk Sheriff's deputies took the injured suspects into custody and found two other suspects hiding behind a nearby fence.
Well at least a gator didn't eat him.Authorities say a South Florida man who bet $50 that he could swim across a canal behind his house drowned while attempting the feat.
I don't think education is the magic cure all bullet for Florida's stoopidness, but I'm sorta sure this kid didn't learn that much from playing video games every day during school hours.DeLAND, Fla. -- A DeLand woman's lax attitude about school attendance landed her in jail, according to the state attorney's office in Volusia County.
Penny Kersey, 32, was arrested after the Volusia County Sheriff's Office discovered her 10-year-old son had missed more than 64 days of school at Freedom Elementary. All of the missed days were unexcused absences.
When I had a few vacation days to burn I had intentions of staying local to get some tasks I've put off for awhile finally taken care of. And then Saturday morning my bud called me from the Atlantic Coast, tellin' me the surf looked epic, and that he has beer in his fridge and he'd welcome me to crash on the couch. I strapped my board to the car's roof and crossed Interstate 4. Then on Sunday night I received a call from another bud wanting to rub it in that he's fishing in The Keys and that I'd have to go back to work on Monday. I told him "work is for kids" and that he'd "see me in 5 hours". Now I sit here at home again wearing the same boardshorts I pulled on 5 days ago. Not a chore complete, not a blog post in nearly a week, slightly hungover and dreading my return to work tomorrow. You can always count on me to flake out on you.
It doesn't mean I believe in UFO's. Yet it goes without saying that stoopid Floridians thought E.T. had phoned home. The U.S. Coast Guard says they were notified after-the-fact that the Air Force was conducting a "flare exercise" offshore. Spencer says they typically notify the Coast Guard of any exercises.
Rusty Parham, who witnessed the light show over Fort Myers Beach, says he believes there might be more to it than flare exercises.
"I don't understand why you'd be in that formation doing drills, and another thing I don't understand is why you'd be doing that off the coast, where everybody could see you in South Florida," he said. "Listen, I'm not nuts. I've lived here my whole life. I've never seen anything like this."
How disappointing.
Better than a cheap Walmart knockoff. 
Looking at this mugshot you'd think he'd have been heartless enough to run over a nun pushing a baby carriage. But...... 
When I had a few vacation days to burn I had intentions of staying local to get some tasks I've put off for awhile finally taken care of. And then Saturday morning my bud called me from the Atlantic Coast, tellin' me the surf looked epic, and that he has beer in his fridge and he'd welcome me to crash on the couch. I strapped my board to the car's roof and crossed Interstate 4. 
