Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Hard to find a hero

Wasn't kidding when I said before that the only people you should admire should also be dead. They'll never have a chance to disappoint you.
Former Giants running back, and current NBC broadcaster, Tiki Barber is leaving his wife for a former NBC intern named Traci Johnson (seen at right). It's typical gossip fodder except that Ginny Barber, Tiki's wife of 11 years, is eight months pregnant. With twins.

If you thought Jaimee Grubbs got a lot of attention for having an affair with Tiger Woods, wait until Google gets a hold of Johnson, a former co-worker of Barber's who has been described by the New York Post as "sexy" and "a model-thin bombshell." And Tiki broke the news to everyone in the classiest, most thoughtful way possible: via press release

Here's the deal, and possibly new rule for guys that do well with the opposite sex(and probably for women, too, I just don't feel comfortable speaking for the other 1/2 of the population): No marriage certificate should be issued to you until you turn 30. Until that time you are to screw everyone that's willing, up to and including the chunky girl you meet at 3AM at Waffle House.

This is the only way I know that'll possibly prevent a mid-life crisis. If you've already 'done it all', you, in theory, should be less likely to stray later in life.

5 comments:

Kath said...

Skank. Poop. Jerk. Butthead.

Hope he's happy in his future loser life.

Wek said...

Yeah, pretty much an azzhole. Not sure what he has in common with a 23 year old besiding wanting to have sex?

He'll be crawling back in a year. Hopefully she'll slam the door in his face and tell him to keep on sending her checks.

Kath said...

But you know what, if he's clinging to youth (yeah, in more ways than one!!), maybe he's still trying to be the hot shot.

So do guys ever get that out of their system? I'm thinking not.

You might still be in good shape or you might be the paunchy, balding guy, but you're still talking trash and trying to put the moves on every young female that lives and breathes -- because that's just what you've always done.

Kath said...

And when I say "do guys ever get that out of their system" -- I mean the ones who were like that in the FIRST place.

There are nice guys out there. No, really, there are.

Wek said...

During my teens and 20's I acted horrible. It was as much ego as hormones. I guess since I'm getting near Viagra age I don't feel the same 'needs' I once had. But I seriously do not think I'd have been capable of a monogomous relationship had I not lived that way during my youth. The suckers that never lived wildly or only 1/2 wildly seem to have the problem of straying later in life (keep in mind this is just my opinion. As you know I'm way to lazy to do research).